


on your wedding day

by bapaldeul



Series: we shared a moment that will last till the end [12]
Category: Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: But don't quote me on that, Exes, Exes meet again, Lighthearted angst, M/M, Wedding Planning, suit fitting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-08
Updated: 2019-03-08
Packaged: 2019-11-13 21:31:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,012
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18039416
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bapaldeul/pseuds/bapaldeul
Summary: after disappearing from jihoon's life for five years, daniel returns - not without news that he's finally getting married, and he needs someone to attend last minute suit fittings with him.jihoon realises that this might be his last chance to let go of any repressed grudges, and maybe even any lingering feelings.





	on your wedding day

**Author's Note:**

> nobody asked me to write this but i still had the idea suddenly yesterday so i had to whip it up somehow.
> 
> i apologise for the obvious angst genre but i tried to make it as bittersweet as possible for both of them.
> 
> title is taken from the korean movie, "on your wedding day" which you all should definitely watch because it's beautiful. but the plot of this does not follow that of the movie.
> 
> enjoy :)

As with all of Park Jihoon’s bad decisions, it starts with Park Woojin. And as with all of Park Woojin’s initiated bad ideas, it starts with Jihoon’s shitty job. Don’t quote him on this, but sometimes he just wishes he could throw his resignation letter in his boss’s face and storm out of the firm. But the world revolves around money, and right now, Jihoon needs a lot of it.

 

“You are being so dramatic,” Woojin rolls his eyes while twirling the glass in his right hand like he is some kind of cool kid. Jihoon thinks he is just being cheesy. “Your job is not _that_ bad.”

 

“Tell that to my measly salary, unpaid leave, terrible work hours, gossipy colleagues and terrible cafeteria food!”

 

“I like how food is causing you as much mental stress as your pay is,” Woojin points out, earning him a slap on his shoulder. Jihoon is just projecting - and Woojin understands. Thankfully, Park Woojin is smart enough to order another pour of whiskey.

 

No more shots, they’re not college frat boys anymore.

 

“Easy for you to say when you’re practically rolling in money,” Jihoon huffs.

 

Woojin and his boyfriend have been investing in the stock market as some kind of “plan for their future”. Which sector; Jihoon’s not particularly sure of. Woojin makes sure not to make it obvious to their friend group, but being his _best_ friend has some benefits, including knowing how much dough he’s currently rolling in.

 

“I could lend you money if you really needed it.”

 

“Nah,” Jihoon politely rejects. Woojin has always been too nice; admittedly always having a soft spot for Jihoon. “Just continue to meet me at noisy bars and listen to me rant about my boss. That’s all I really need right now.”

 

Woojin squeezes Jihoon’s shoulder as his form of encouragement to the other man and Jihoon accepts it willingly. They allow the band that’s playing tonight take the stage and fill the silence between them for awhile until Woojin’s phone starts to ring.

 

Jihoon waves Woojin away, signalling for him to take the call outside. It’s probably some kind of business thing Jihoon is not really interested in poking his nose into anyway.

 

Fixing his gaze onto the band while Woojin is gone, Jihoon wonders when’s the last time he did something _crazy_ . And by crazy, he means like - _fuck the consequences, just live in the moment_ kind of crazy.

 

He remembers his prime years as his college days; and this is usually the part where his friends boo at him by telling him to get over his pessimistic ass and focus on the bright future he has ahead of him instead of constantly reminiscing about the past.

 

Maybe it’s just because he’s never been able to _move on_ as quickly as others.

 

“Another round, please,” Jihoon smiles at the bartender that’s been serving them the entire night. He looks mildly concern but still refills Jihoon’s glass with the same drink anyway.

 

Jihoon’s older now; more informed to make even better decisions. For example, including knowing his alcohol limits. Right now, he’s far from that. During his college days, he’d go absolutely batshit crazy even if he knew he would wake up with a headache that feels like he’d just been shot in the head.

 

College, college, college.

 

It’s all he can really think about these days. How he should’ve held on to those days longer, knowing they would one day come to an end.

 

“Yo, I’m back. You look like you were spacing out. You feeling okay?” Woojin’s voice nicely breaks Jihoon’s train of thought before it enters a dark tunnel. He just grins at his friend.

 

“I’m not nineteen anymore, you know.”

 

“I know,” Woojin replies sarcastically with his tongue stuck out of his mouth, mocking Jihoon’s seriousness. “But you’re still Park Jihoon, _so_.”

 

“What does that mean?” Jihoon replies, fully offended.

 

When Woojin shifts uncomfortably in his bar chair for the first time that friday night, Jihoon instantly knows that something is wrong.

 

“Hey… Jihoon? We’re best friends, right?”

 

Woojin plays with his fingers, and Jihoon has to stop him by covering Woojin’s hands with his own. It’s a habit Jihoon has learnt to stop overtime. With nowhere to put his fingers, Woojin’s expression twists anxiously as he searches for the words to put his thoughts into.

 

“And you know, that I would never do anything to hurt you. Even though I threaten your life many times over, I’d never actually want you to feel upset-”

 

“You didn’t kill my family, right?” Jihoon laughs aloud, clasping Woojin’s hands together. “I’m going to be fine. What’s going on? What was that phone call about?”

 

“An old friend of mine called. A really, really, good friend that I’ve lost contact with for about five years.”

 

It’s the first time Woojin is mentioning this friend. If Woojin had a special friend, Jihoon would know about it.

 

“You know _him_ too, Jihoon.”

 

Suddenly, Jihoon has a sinking feeling that he knows exactly who had called Woojin, and whose name Woojin is so hesitant to say in front of him. But Jihoon keeps mum, forcing Woojin to finish his sentence. He’s afraid that he might speak his worst fears into existence.

 

Alas, it doesn’t make a difference. He thinks he feels Woojin holding his hand tight before saying,

 

“Jihoon ah, Niel hyung is getting married.”

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

It shouldn’t matter to Jihoon, not at this point in life. Sure - ask the Park Jihoon five years younger than he is and he might throw a tantrum. But now, now it’s none of Jihoon’s business. He should’ve moved on by now. It’s been _five_ years. Five years to meet other people, five years to get over his first love.

 

But as already mentioned, Jihoon takes a lot longer than the average person to move on.

 

He remains stiff in his position for a while.

 

“He’s getting married,” Jihoon says, just to hear how it would sound like hearing himself say it.

 

Woojin has a crooked smile on his face.

 

“He needs a small favour from you,” Woojin says very slowly. Suddenly, his voice is all Jihoon can hear bursting in his head. The band, the chatter of people around him start to fade into the background as white noise.

 

“But I told him no promises. You don’t have to do anything you’re uncomfortable with. I want you to promise me this first-”

 

“Tell me,” Jihoon betrays himself by letting the words slip even before he can consider the consequences of his actions. “What does he need from me?”

 

“They’re having a suit fitting tomorrow afternoon. But Niel hyung’s husband has suddenly been sent overseas for work, and they can’t cancel. The next appointment isn’t for months and…” Woojin gulps before saying the next words. “They’re getting married in four weeks.”

 

It dawns on Jihoon what exactly he needs Jihoon to do.

 

“You don’t have to do it,” Woojin assures Jihoon once again. “You don’t owe him anything. He also said not to put pressure on you to agree.”

 

But Woojin shrugs, “Though he did say… there’d be no one else more _perfect_ to accompany him to get the fittings in place of his absent husband instead.”

 

 _No one else more perfect,_ huh.

 

“I’ll do it.”

 

Woojin’s eyes grow wide in surprise, “Maybe you should give me more thought before deciding-”

 

“He has to be on his wit’s end to ask his ex-boyfriend to do wedding suit fittings for him. And it’s his _special day._ How can I live with myself after this - knowing I could’ve done something to make his special day even better?”

 

Much more than anyone else, Jihoon is an excellent liar. It could have been the various acting and theatre classes he’s taken, but maybe he’s just gotten better at hiding his true feelings for the sake of other people instead.

 

“You’re going to be okay, right?”

 

“You said it yourself, I’m Park Jihoon. How can I _not_ be okay?”

 

Jihoon orders them another round before Woojin can protest and get him to change his mind. He’d wanted to do something crazy so here it is, something completely out of this world and probably stupid and very evidently going to hurt.

 

If only _he_ hadn’t taught Jihoon to be crazy sometimes.

 

Maybe Jihoon wouldn’t have taken up his equally crazy offer five years later.

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

Jihoon realises the seriousness of the situation the next morning, when he opens his eyes and sees Woojin’s text with the address where Jihoon is supposed to be in an hour or so.

 

Definitely not enough time to wash up and be pretty, then.

 

Throwing up the covers, Jihoon sprints to find something presentable enough to face _him_ in. Though it really wouldn’t matter, because he’s seen Jihoon in every possible way. But again, it’s been five years. Maybe there’s still some sort of competitiveness in Jihoon to look good - maybe even better than him.

 

Something that says; _I’m doing great without you, see?_

 

Except that even his dressing would be a lie. Everything that Jihoon is bringing with him today is a complete lie. He’s not doing great, he wants to quit his lousy job, and he’s doing wedding suit fittings for his ex. Nothing could make him look any less _pathetic_ than he already is.

 

So Jihoon throws on a grey hoodie, to send a different message.

 

Something like; _I could really care less that you’re getting married - I just want to get this over and done with._

 

Except that would still be a lie too.

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

No amount of preparation could actually set Jihoon up perfectly for this day. Whatever he’s imagined on the way here, it’s effectively destroyed from the moment Jihoon enters the store, the bell jingle announcing his presence, until the moment Jihoon lays his eyes on the man in a perfectly altered suit in the corner of the room.

 

Time and time again, Kang Daniel _never_ fails to take his breath away.

 

He has his hair black now, fitting of his age and more sophisticated demeanor. But Jihoon figures that everything else stays the same. The smile that never hides itself and the dimple on the side of his cheek that raises itself along with his eyelids that form the prettiest crescents.

 

“Jihoon, you’re here.”

 

All those years, Jihoon would have _killed_ to hear him say his name like that again. Because the last time he’d said it; it’d been filled with regret, disappointment and worst of all, apathy.

 

Jihoon opens his mouth but the words never come out.

 

Instead, he chokes and Daniel has to pat his back soothingly while the tailor stares at them.

 

“I-I’m fine,” Jihoon says while trying to take in more air.

 

When he finally stops choking, he tries to correct his posture in order to seem more confident, suave, but it’s all in vain after that stunt he’d pulled.

 

“You’re scared me a little there,” Daniel chuckles.

 

Jihoon wonders how Daniel could act so comfortably around him; especially when they haven’t even exchanged greetings for five years. Jihoon had contemplated wishing Daniel on his birthday the first year after they broke up. In the end, he’d written and erased about a thousand text messages because they all seemed to end to same way. It’s embarrassing to admit it now, but Jihoon wanted Daniel to _take me back, please._

 

“You scared me more,” Jihoon finally replies. “What with the sudden wedding news and all.”

 

Daniel looks so _happy -_ Jihoon really cannot even attempt to dampen his mood.

 

“I’m so sorry you had to hear it from Woojin. I… lost your number,” Daniel hangs his head low as a form of embarrassment, his cheeks burning red; and Jihoon wonders if it is really out of embarrassment or guilt. Whether it’s a fact or just an excuse to avoid him.

 

He still knows Daniel’s number by heart. That is - if he still has the same one.

 

Jihoon doubts it. He would have changed it by now.

 

“It’s fine. You should buy Woojin a meal soon though- _no_ , better yet, ask _him_ to buy you a meal. Don’t tell him I told you this, but he’s been eating really good ever since you’ve been gone,” Jihoon says. It’s easy talking about Woojin because it’s not about Daniel or Jihoon so it’s fine, just fine.

 

“Woojin?” Daniel sounds surprised. “Damn have I missed a lot since I’ve been gone.”

 

Jihoon grits his teeth at the sound of that.

 

 _What about me?_ He wants to yell at Daniel like a child that has just had his candy taken away. _Do you have any idea what I’ve missed?_

 

The answer is really simple.

 

“You,” Jihoon unconsciously speaks his mind.

 

When Daniel stares at him blankly, Jihoon sputters to save himself, “I mean- _you_ look amazing. The suit looks really nice. You picked it out yourself?”

 

Daniel leads Jihoon to where all the suits are being hung from racks, some even displayed on mannequins in the middle of the store. They all look breathtaking and expensive, honestly. Only someone like Daniel would look like he had the _class_ to be shopping here. Jihoon feels like he shouldn’t even be _existing_ near this shop.

 

“I’ve picked out a few and sent some pictures to Jiwoo. But he’s on business and I don’t think he’s read my last few messages- so I’m _kind of_ freaking out here,” Daniel points to an empty rack with three suits hanging from it.

 

The mention of the third party that is supposed to be standing in Jihoon’s place right now kind of feels like a sword being driven through his chest and twisted but he stands tall.

 

“Don’t freak out,” Jihoon mumbles, reaching for the first suit.. “They’re all beautiful.”

 

“You think?” Daniel taps his foot impatiently on the floor. “God- I’m sorry for doing this to you. It’s just super scary to know I could pick something he didn’t like. Who knew picking out clothes could be this traumatizing?”

 

Even if he’s five years older, he’s still classic Kang Daniel. Five years doesn’t really change anything about the man in front of him. Jihoon recognises all his little habits, from the unconscious biting of nails to shorter breaths and his constantly shifting eyes.

 

He’s terrified.

 

Jihoon grips onto Daniel’s shoulders; something that’s always proven to be a difficult task because of their height difference.

 

“Stop panicking,” he commands. “I’m here to help you make a decision. Let me try on all three suits and you can decide which one you like best. Anyway, I’m sure whichever you choose, your soon to be husband is sure to love it.”

 

“Because _he_ loves you.” Jihoon adds belatedly, bringing a soft smile to Daniel’s face.

 

“Okay,” Daniel nods. “You look beautiful today, by the way.”

 

The tailor hands Jihoon the first suit and ushers him into the changing room.

 

Just before the curtains close, Daniel says, “I just wanted to say that - so you’d know I didn’t think that just because of the suit. I really mean it. You look beautiful, even now.”

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

Being in a wedding suit is weird. Jihoon has never thought that there would actually come a day where he would have to get fitted for one, but here he is, holding his breath while waiting for the curtains to be opened and have his ex-boyfriend watching him.

 

“I’m ready,” Jihoon calls out.

 

The tailor opens the curtains for him, and Jihoon has to direct his gaze elsewhere, anywhere away from him. It’s enough that Daniel hasn’t changed out of his own suit - but for Jihoon to be in one as well. It’s painful.

 

He still manages a small smile.

 

“So?”

 

The cuffs are a bit long, but they can work with that.

 

Daniel has been quiet for too long to be normal now, so Jihoon prompts him again, “I like the way this one feels. It’s light. Very functional, too. What do _you_ think, though?”

 

“I think…” Daniel trails off, leaving Jihoon to fill in the silence with their breaths.

 

“I think you look amazing.”

 

Jihoon wishes he’d heard it wrong.

 

Not _“you look amazing”_ , idiot. The _suit_ looks amazing.

 

But Daniel has always kind of been like that. He speaks his mind, sometimes without the slightest filter and thinking back; maybe that was what had Jihoon falling. He’d never felt like Daniel was faking it with him.

 

“This suit has more of a traditional feel, maybe you would like to try on the second one? It’s more modern and quite popular among our customers as well.”

 

Jihoon gives in to the tailor after getting his measurements taken, then changes into the second suit. The silence in the room is stifling and Jihoon wonders what Daniel is thinking about. The usually enthusiastic and chatty man has now fallen completely silent and Jihoon has no idea where to go from here.

 

“I like this one better,” Jihoon says when the curtains open, hoping to break the ice.

 

“Hm,” Daniel just hums. “This one looks great, too. It hugs your shoulders just right. Correct me if I’m wrong but have you been working out?”

 

Feeling the blush rush up to his face in embarrassment, Jihoon can only laugh in response to Daniel’s sudden personal question.

 

“Not really,” he scratches the nape of his neck awkwardly under Daniel’s gaze. “You know how I’m like with gyms. I barely have time to work out, anyway.”

 

It should be just friendly conversation between the both of them but Jihoon has the feeling it could somehow transcend into something more and that scares him to no end. He’s not ready to talk to Daniel - yet he wonders how he ended up in this room, just a few feet apart from the person he’s been avoiding for years.

 

Maybe love makes you do stupid things.

 

Jihoon catches himself there.

 

He doesn’t _love_ Daniel anymore.

 

“I’m sorry. I should’ve asked how you were doing first instead. Where are you working now?”

 

“Don’t talk to me about work on a Saturday,” Jihoon groans.

 

Daniel giggles even though Jihoon hasn’t said anything even remotely funny. And maybe that’s another reason why Jihoon loved spending time with the other man. He’s always felt so loved, so accepted and Daniel has always made Jihoon _feel good_ about himself - even when he knows he’s a total loser.

 

So yeah.

 

Maybe he still does love Kang Daniel. Just a little part of him in his heart which he is sure to keep locked away forever and makes sure to throw away the key after. Because it doesn’t matter now - Daniel’s getting married.

 

“Hate the job?” Daniel ignores Jihoon’s obvious distaste for the subject.

 

“You have no idea,” Jihoon shrugs. “I have a horrible boss that makes me work overtime almost everyday. I thought studying Law in college would bring me the brightest future…”

 

His shoulders slack as he catches sight of himself in the mirror.

 

Even in the most beautiful suit, Jihoon still can’t stand the sight of himself.

 

“But look at me,” he sighs. “Guess I really can’t predict the future.”

 

“Having a boyfriend doing a major in Law was one of the best things to happen to me in college,” Daniel says.

 

Jihoon freezes, not expecting Daniel to bring anything up related to _them_.

 

But he’s always been the unpredictable one.

 

“The best part was having someone to flaunt about. You have no idea how many times I’ve dropped your name just to get into a party with the cool kids. You were smart, charismatic, and _so god damn charming_. No one could believe someone like you was going out with someone like me.”

 

Jihoon snorts, playing with his sleeve to ease the sudden tension, “So I was just your trophy wife?”

 

Daniel stands up and squeezes Jihoon’s arm.

 

“You _know_ that’s not what you were to me.”

 

Jihoon shivers, but it must be because of the air-conditioning in this place.

 

“You were so passionate,” Daniel grins. “I remember you chewing my ear off for countless nights just talking about what you wanted to achieve as a lawyer when you grew up. Often times - I liked to shut you up with, you know.”

 

Daniel points to his lips suggestively and Jihoon slaps his chest gently as a sigh for him to shut up.

 

“I don’t know what’s holding you back now, but it pains me to see that same fire I fell in love with burning out. You’re capable of so much more, believe me. You know what - if you told me you wanted to be president one day I would believe you even without a single doubt. You’re that amazing; _trust me._ ”

 

Jihoon shifts uncomfortably in Daniel’s sudden wave of compliments.

 

“You’re just saying that,” Jihoon protests.

 

He’s always been better with words. Always able to make Jihoon feel like three times the man he actually was. It was nice back then. But now… when countless things seperate the both of them, it just doesn’t feel the same anymore.

 

“I’m not,” Daniel replies. “I would never lie to you - _ever_.”

 

_I would never lie to you._

 

It takes Jihoon back to the Incheon Airport five years ago. Bags were packed, hugs and farewells exchanged but Jihoon just sat far away from where it was all happening. Until Daniel had broken away from the crowd - and knelt down on one knee to match Jihoon’s eye level. He can still remember the desperation in Daniel’s eyes.

 

“Jihoonie, I’m going.”

 

The three words that hurt more than, _“Let’s break up.”_

 

But to be fair, Jihoon was the one who had uttered the first words. So Daniel had every right to hurt him back. It was fair. The teardrops that rolled down his cheeks and stained his light blue jeans were quickly wiped away by Daniel’s thumb.

 

“Are you not going to say anything to me?” Daniel’s voice was husky, choked up, _hurt_.

 

Jihoon did that to him. And still he had refused to say a word, be it out of anger, sadness or spite. It was all his fault; and he had allowed Daniel to walk away from him.

 

Only Daniel has whispered one last thing before he left, while gripping onto Jihoon’s hands tight, let he never wanted to let go.

 

One thing that had Jihoon holding onto for five years like a complete fool.

 

“Jihoon, I still love you.”

  
  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

“ _-Jihoon?_ Are you listening?”

 

Jihoon now smiles at the man before him. He can smile now because he’s stronger than the Park Jihoon at the airport five years ago. His eyes don’t miss the engagement ring that Daniel now wears on his fourth finger. Jihoon realises that maybe; just maybe, it’s _his_ turn to let go.

 

“Sorry, I zoned out. Shall we try on the final suit?”

 

Daniel doesn’t look convinced, but pats Jihoon on the back again.

 

“Thanks again, Jihoonie.”

 

Jihoon should say thank you to Daniel, too.

 

_Thank you for giving me one last opportunity to see you before you got married._

 

_Thank you for allowing me to have loved someone like you._

 

_Thank you for loving me._

 

But the curtains close again, before Jihoon can even get a word out.

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

The way Daniel’s face lights up tells Jihoon that this one is _the one_.

 

Weirdly enough, Jihoon knows this is the one too. From the moment he puts the suit on, he knows Daniel is going to love it. It fits like a sleeve and it makes him feel… well, happy. No more grudges, no more pain. Just happiness.

 

And he hopes that it will be just like that for Daniel from now on.

 

They share a knowing grin when the curtains are opened for the last time.

 

“I love it,” Daniel says in a small voice, too scared to show his obvious excitement.

 

“I love it too,” Jihoon sighs, patting the suit down. “It’s beautiful. And it matches yours, too.”

 

“Come here,” Daniel beckons for Jihoon to stand beside him. “I want to see how we look.”

 

When Jihoon looks into the full body mirror and sees two faces staring back at him, he realizes exactly how much they’ve both grown. Though they don’t look exactly the same anymore, there are just some things that don’t change.

 

Like how Daniel smiles like he’s got the entire sun in him.

 

And how Jihoon feels like the luckiest man in the world to be able to share this experience with Daniel.

 

“How much do you like it? On a scale of 1 to 10?”

 

Jihoon remembers exactly why they’d come up with this way of communicating before. When words and feelings weren’t easy, numbers translated it for them instead. It sounds childish now, but it helped Jihoon know exactly how down Daniel was feeling one day, and it helped Daniel understand how numb Jihoon was feeling after his grandfather had passed suddenly one day.

 

It was _their_ thing - something Jihoon has never forgotten after all these years.

 

“10,” Daniel grins. “There’s no other answer. It’s a perfect 10.”

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

Jihoon watches the tailor hang the suits up again in a daze as he finalises the measurements with Daniel. Just yesterday, he was feeling completely hopeless about his job and dreams. But now, he somehow feels more confident, more ready to face whatever life continues to throw his way.

 

It’s almost like magic, the way Daniel makes him feel.

 

“Hey, Jihoon?”

 

Daniel sounds unsure as he walks towards Jihoon with a frown on his face, and Jihoon’s heart sinks, wondering if there’s a problem.

 

“Are the suits okay?” he rises to his feet.

 

“The suits are fine,” Daniel assures him with a forced smile. “I just… wanted to give you this.”

 

He pulls out a white envelope from his bag and Jihoon instantly know what it is.

 

_Kang Daniel and Kim Jiwoo invite you to celebrate their marriage on 8 March 2019._

 

Jihoon’s breath falters in front of the unassuming invitation.

 

“I must be a jerk for thinking to invite you,” Daniel chews on his lower lip, not knowing what else to say.

 

 _Yeah_ , Jihoon thinks. _The kind of jerk I’d fall in love with._

 

“It would just make me the happiest man if you were there too.”

 

_Idiot. You’re already going to be the happiest man if I’m not there. It’s your wedding day._

 

Jihoon thinks their wedding is going to be beautiful, and nothing less. Their best friends and family are going to gather and talk about how the couple had met, and cheer when they put their wedding rings on each other and kiss.

 

As strong as Jihoon thinks he’s become, he doesn’t think he’ll ever be ready to watch Kang Daniel marry someone else.

 

Because without a doubt, Jihoon had always thought it would be _him_.

 

“I’m sorry,” Jihoon whispers in a voice only Daniel can hear. “I’m really sorry Niel, I don’t think I can do that.”

 

Daniel stands straight, and retrieves the invitation back from Jihoon’s hands.

 

“It’s okay. You’ve already done so much for me. It would be selfish to ask for anything more.”

 

Jihoon wishes he could do so much more; be as selfless as Daniel had been when they were still dating. But he just cannot bring himself to do it.

 

“So… I’m meeting Woojin for lunch,” Jihoon says, hoping they will skip past this topic as quickly as possible.

 

Daniel glances at the clock, belatedly realising how long they’ve been together.

 

“ _God-_ I’m sorry. I kept you for so long. I’m sorry, you should leave first, I have lots of other errands to run anyway. Planning a wedding is tiring,” Daniel sighs.

 

This time, Jihoon doesn’t want to leave. He doesn’t know when they might meet again; or if they’re _ever_ going to meet again. They’re barely friends anymore and though Jihoon has already been through five years without Kang Daniel, it pains him to wonder what it would feel like to go through _another forever_ without him.

 

But if Jihoon doesn’t leave now - he might never.

 

“I’ll see you around, Niel hyung,” Jihoon says, although he knows it might be a lie.

 

“Wait!” Daniel calls out after him.

 

As he’s pulled into a hug that squeezes the life out of him, Jihoon wonders what would happen if he had said, “Wait” to Daniel instead five years ago. Would things have been any different from the way they are now? Would he be the one walking down that aisle instead? It hurts to hope, so Jihoon stops.

 

Daniel gives the best hugs. It’s Jihoon’s safe haven, and knowing that this is their last time, he tries to memorise every second of it.

 

“Thank you for everything,” Daniel says, rubbing Jihoon’s back soothingly.

 

“Be happy, Niel hyung.”

 

_Be happy, my love._

 

Jihoon’s glad he has the opportunity to be the one walking away this time. Staying and hoping is so much harder. So he takes one last good look at Daniel, and pushes the door open, revealing a completely different world on the outside.

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

_“How much do you love me? On a scale of 1 to 10?”_

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

Daniel’s glad he’s the one watching Jihoon walk away this time. Being the one to leave first is single handedly the most painful thing he’s had to deal with this entire lifetime. Instead, he is thankful for the chance to watch Jihoon’s back as he crosses the road and disappear from his line of sight.

 

He never lies, not to Jihoon.

 

And he’s happy he had one last chance to tell Jihoon he loves him, in Daniel’s very own way.

 

“So, Mr Kang, are you going to go with the final suit?”

 

Daniel scrutinizes the third suit hanging prettily on the clothes rack, sighing when he can only see one person in it; and no one else.

 

“No,” he shakes his head. “I’ll take the second one instead, thank you.”

 

Whether a blessing or a curse, Daniel doesn’t think he’ll ever be able to forget Park Jihoon. At least not for this eternity.

  
  
  
  


 

 

 

 

_“Infinities upon infinities. That’s how much I love you.”_

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> i hope you all liked this short one shot for me in the midst of me updating overboard~ i realised we really don't get lots of exes!nielwink trope so here i am... watering the tag i guess
> 
> if you liked it do leave a comment so that it can motivate me to write more~ all of your comments really cheer me up!!
> 
> but until the next story, take care<3


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